The Tale of The Vogue
by imafeckingstarr
Summary: Rose Weasley is due to start her fifth year at Hogwarts, and is determined to change from her typical bookishly boring self. When she finds a mysterious magazine called "WiziVogue"; Rose doesn't see the harm in using it; until the unmentionable occurs.


**The Tale of The Vogue**

**By imafeckingstarr**

_Summery: Rose Weasley is due to start her fifth year at Hogwarts, and is determined to change from her typical bookishly boring self to someone who'll be noticed by anyone and everyone – everyone meaning the "Sex on Legs" Scorpius Malfoy. When she finds a mysterious magazine labelled WiziVogue – an item from the distant future – Rose doesn't see the harm in using it; until the unmentionable occurs. Will she be able to rid herself of the magazine before it's too late?_

A/N: Hello, Hello, Hello! I found this on my USB Key the other day, and I said, pretty loudly "ZOMG A ROSE AND SCORPIUS ROMANCE! SINCE WHEN DID I HAVE THIS?" Thus resulting in more suspicions of my insanity - which I can reassure you guys now, I lost a very, very, very long time ago. My family just doesn't see it :)  
I decided to post this before I posted the next chapter to _"A Riddle for Riddle"_ to see if people liked it and would like me to continue writing it, so please review with your opinions! ...Obviously once you've read it :')  
Enjoy!

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'_How I Managed To Make A Fool Of Myself Within A Matter Of Minutes'_

I've never mentioned how utterly unfair my life is, have I? No, I didn't think I had. Have I ever mentioned how irritating and bothersome it is to have a younger brother and two masculine cousins (Hugo; he's younger than me by two years – James; the school 'heart-throb' is in his final year at Hogwarts – and Al; my best friend in the whole wide world) who find hilarity out of my misfortune and complete clumsiness? No, I haven't, have I?

I, Rose Hermione Weasley, am the ungainly klutz of the Potter/Weasley family.

You all think I'm being a little melodramatic, don't you? But I'm not being melodramatic in the slightest; I swear. I've always been a truthful little girl (the 'little' part isn't an understatement either, I'm a natural midget); I've never lied about _anything. _Well, diminutively miniature white lies don't count, do they? No, seriously; I'm telling you the truth. Witches honor.

None of you believe me, do you? Why can't you see that I'm telling you the honest, embarrassing, never-told-be-spoken-of-ever-again truth? Ask anyone, ask James Sirius Potter for crying out loud! He'll tell you…

He'll also tell you a bunch of other things that are highly irrelevant to this situation, so we won't go there (not just yet anyway).

_September 1__st__ 2021_

The first day back to school is _always_ the worst, no matter what everyone else says. It's horrible and exhausting, not to mention the large amount of disasters that always seem to occur with my family and I. It's a fate that seems stupidly inevitable.

"Rosie, get your brothers trunk out of the car will you?" My Dad asked me, his hand running through his ginger hair. I pulled a face; did he really want me to die trying to get Hugo's trunk out of the car? That thing was huge! How on Earth did he expect me to pick it up?

"Hurry up Rose, we haven't got all day," My Dad continued. I just growled in frustration; and I was fairly certain that thing Hugo called his school trunk was bigger than me.

As I tugged repeatedly at the fat thing with all of my strength, a gush of wind surrounded me. Emerging from the dust was a dark hooded figure. I could feel the colour draining from my face as my heart accelerated in fright. Backing away from the car slowly, this thing came at me with immense speed and hung me upside down by my leg.

All I could do was scream 'rape.'

A guffawed suppress of laughter erupted from the chest of this thing (was it a person? I wasn't sure) as it dropped me on my head. "Ha-ha-ha Rose! You should have seen your face," The familiar voice of my insane cousin James hit my ears.

He lifted the hood from his face to prove it was him; and as he did I flew at him like a flying monkey, rugby tackling him to the floor as I crashed into him. He'd managed to embarrass me yet again within a matter of a few bloody minutes!

My life was so enjoyable.

NOT.

"James Sirius Potter you complete _arse_!" I hissed as we both hit the concrete with a loud thud, the pair of us getting odd looks from my parents and passerby's.

"Now, now Rosie none of that foul language, after all; how can you call me, James Sirius _gorgeously talented Gryffindor Seeker_ Potter a complete arse?" He asked me with a wink. All I could do was roll my eyes at his arrogance and stupidity. How could my cousin be so vain? Oh, I forgot. He's the school bloody heart-throb; he has to be vain, and perfect and "simply irresistible". Urgh, he's so cliché I could gag.

"If I didn't know any better James, I would say that you're in love with yourself," I snapped, standing up quickly and brushing off bits of dust and dirt from my clothes (a long sleeved rich purple colored jumper, black leggings, and matching ballet pumps). These were new, items of clothing I had slaved away to purchase; I wasn't going to get them ruined. I wasn't one for fashion like my clothing fanatic cousin Lily, but I liked to look nice once in a while.

I'm still a girl y'know. I like to _try_ and look pretty. 'Try' being the verb here. Both Lily and I have violent red hair, yet hers is glossy and sleek, and mine is bushy and untamable. It's not fair, it takes Lily all of five seconds to brush her hair to make it look perfect and it takes me at least an hour to get mine looking at least a little bit presentable. My skin was quite pale, and in the sun I wouldn't tan like _normal _people would; I'd go beet red and look like the wife of Mr. Krabbs, the lobster from the muggle television show _SpongeBob Squarepants. _

I sighed as I walked off, leaving James to carry Hugo's trunk – knowing James, he'd flex his muscles to prove he had some and _then_ pick up Hugo's trunk like it was the lightest thing in the world.

_Boys!_ I thought with a sigh as I followed Mum and Dad towards the infamous Hogwarts barrier, _Can my life really get any worse than this?_


End file.
